Haven't talked to Michael in a week. We have texted a couple times and emailed. He is concentrating on college and career! It is good to see this in a man! I have been with too many that I was just dumb!!!!! I keep thinking that singleness is the best way! Then, I really want to be loved by that man that is just for me! Enough on that!
I am feeling the pressures of life and wonder how long things will continue as they are? I start school again on Monday. Working 14 hours and taking 12 credits. I wonder if the excitement will come again as I have always loved learning and looked forward to college! This semester, I just feel like I am going to craiter before I am even stated! Life at home is full of adventure! I feel like I am more of a bother to Jack and Lynda and that no matter what I do, there is always a list that needs done! I feel like I have disappointed them and yet, how can I do anymore than what I am doing? I feel burned out and exhausted! I know Lynda and I both need a lone time and quite time and time with no one around! I gave her a few hours a lone and took Jack with me on New Year's Day before I left to get Michael from the airport! I know it wasn't much, but I did all I could do!
I try so hard to help her and I feel like it is never enough! I know Lynda is running on the strength of Jesus Christ! I know she is worn out and in need of refreshment! I promised myself a week away in December-never happened! It seems like the time Lynda and me are together is based on taking care of Jack and work! I long to take a vacation with Lynda and just let us be ourselves without a care in the world! I am so grateful when I need prayer at night, she is more than willing to come and pray! I have never had that in my life prior to living here! I thank God for Lynda and I thank Lynda for giving of her time late at night when I have a prayer need!!!
I usually don't blog about home life as I am really sensitive about not wanting to say things that may hurt anyone! I usually write down my thoughts, but tonight I decided after reading, I would blog about some of the things on my heart and mind!
I have been three days sorting, packing up, organizing, and reorganizing my things in the closet and living room! Last semester, I had college books on the floor. I don't want to do this anymore as it looks trashy and unthoughtful! I have purchased one bookshelf and will get another to have a place to put my books when I am not using them! I need to keep organized!
I have been on this diet for almost four weeks. I have noticed changes and not liked most of them! I will be joining a club as I am not able to work out at home! It is hard, but when all are in need, we all need to work together to get through it together!
I love Lynda and Jack so much! There are times that my heart aches! Sounds crazy I know! I have a great deal of respect for both of them and don't want to ever hurt them! I know I have and never have intentionally done so! Please forgive me Lynda in letting you down!
Blessings dear readers!
Do Over!
4 years ago
2 comments:
it doesn't matter who you live with, there are always compromises and doing things to stay organized and in your own space. Having had over 15 roommates, living with family again and now a husband...it never ends. the only time it didn't matter was when I lived alone. They were a very nice three years but the trade off of lonliness wasn't always worth being able to leave a mess.
Good luck getting organized for a busy life! school and work and all the rest of it are good endeavors.
Living together in small spaces is hard. Mice seem to nest well but I struggle. My space is very important to me and I like to rearrange and change it. I like it to look pleasing to me and to be useable for the time at hand. I am old enough to know who I am and what I like, but current needs of you and of our situation here have made living together a temporary answer. I am willing to keep trying to work it out. I am expecting lots from you and giving lots in return. Just try to be cooperative without being sensitive. It can work for the time needed.
Post a Comment